Monday, January 12, 2009

Sugar Cookies

I think a lot of people will identify with this post-holiday sugar withdrawal. It's like we've spent the last month doing crack and now all the crack is gone and all that's left is celery sticks and baby carrots. By the way, did you know that baby carrots are a fraud? That's right, a fraud. They are whittled out of full sized carrots. Just so you know.



I've never been a clerk at a grocery or drug store, so I wonder if keeping a poker face when a customer acts weird and self-conscious about a purchase is part of the training. It would be really tempting to mess with people to relieve the boredom. "Does this jock itch ointment work pretty good? Aren't you just dying to run home and slather some on? I'll try to get you checked out as quickly as I can..."

8 comments:

Christina Awesome said...

Haha this one was amazing
'You must have hundreds of condoms at your house.'

Jeremy said...

I got fired from pumping gas for selling a customer a pack of cigarettes and saying "Here's your cancer"

She was being very rude and loud while I was trying to pump gas. I hated people who would buy cigarettes when we were real busy, instead of just going into the store and buying them.

Mel2 said...

@ Jeremy: Of all the reasons I can think of for getting fired, that has to be among the best ones. Good on ya!

ldisme said...

heehee, the things we think, and sometimes say...

Maybe sugar withdrawal does have something to do with it. I'm pretty sure it's not the carrots.

shipping troll said...

So how many condoms do you buy to look like a player? The 3-pack, 12-pack, or do you spring for the Gross? And do you buy the Extra Large, or the regulars?

I always wanted to buy the Gross on Friday afternoon and come back in Monday and claim it was short by 2...

billibaldi said...

Normally in a drugstore/pharmacy we don't care what you buy, except after getting a prescription filled for Viagra you try asking the sale assistant/clerk out for date.

Chris said...

best deadpan ever.

King Rat said...

Best Deadpan yet.